Teenagers' Brain

Summer has come and all too quickly gone again. Our youngsters are back in school. 

My grandchildren are teenagers now and have taught me a lot this summer—for one thing that the world has changed. To be more precise, I discovered that the world of the teenager is a world apart from ours. Science may have nailed the cause: it’s the teenager’s brain that is in a tumultuous state of growth.

Frontline, August 22, 2012, Inside the Teenage Brain explains it well. Why do the mood and behavior of a teenager swing so unpredictably from one extreme to another? Because the teenage brain is being flooded with an overabundance of new brain cells that need to be tested, pruned and organized. Puberty is a time of growth and change.

The brain seems to develop in two basic steps: spurts of tremendous growth, followed by a period of thorough pruning and re-organizing.  It happens first in the womb and during the first 18 months of life, then again when we start our teens.

If we engage in sports and music during that stormy period, our penchant for sports and music may become hardwired; if we primarily indulge in video games and TV, a soft spot for being a couch potato may gain the upper hand.

The brain continues to change throughout our lifetime.  Yet once a propensity becomes hardwired and becomes a habit, it will be hard to change, because it needs to be unlearned and replaced by something else.

Scientists do agree on one point, teenagers need lots of sleep, nine hours at least. Adequate sleep helps them to retain knowledge and to cope with abstract concepts, such as math and physics.

Also vitally important in the teenagers’ development of the brain are their connections and relationships. Teenagers may appear to push away their parents, but extensive research shows that teenagers crave close relationships and good communications with their elders. Did you ask them, how was school, and were answered, fine? Or did you ask, what did you do all day, and they answered, nothing?  Don’t be dismayed; these answers have been used by teens for centuries, worldwide.

Parents have to be rather specific with their questions. What’s gnawing at you? You look downhearted, or Meet any interesting people on your trip? Teenagers are so preoccupied with pushing their parents aside or ignoring them that it is hard for them to open up without being asked, even if they do want to tell you or get advice.

Ellen Galinsky, President  & Co-founder of Families and Work Institute, in a three-year study found that teenagers wanted their working parents to be less tired and stressed. For them it was important to be together, just to hang loose, maybe chat, not necessarily do planned activities. Her advice is, hang in there, even if they push you away, they want to be with you.

Teenagers give their parents the lowest mark when it comes to knowing what is going on in their lives. Parents fare a little better when it comes to conveying values, though here the teenagers’ answers varied widely.

When asked about their parents’ work, many youngsters had the impression that their parents hate it; yet the parents insisted that they loved their jobs. It turns out that parents come home tired from work and recount the things that went wrong that day.

Most surprising in her study was the realization that the youngsters interviewed worry about their parents—a third of them often or very often, and two-thirds of them some of the time.

Ellen Galinsky asked the teenagers what they cherish most about their family life. It was not the big events or grand vacations, but the small rituals and family traditions that stuck in their minds.

No matter what we perceive, most teenagers want their parents to care what happens in their life and to be accessible to them; they like them to ask questions and show an active interest, especially Dad, who assumes an important role in a teenager’s life, a role that Mom once played when he was little.

There is still much to be learned about the mysteries of the brain. Nonetheless, one thing is certain, our children are our greatest treasure. Besides, they constitute the future of our country.

Until next time,

Rosi