Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Marriage




Statisticians are unanimous—married couples live longer. It’s not surprising. As we grow older and have survived the turbulent years of childrearing and employment, we become more tolerant of the strengths and weaknesses of our partner, and we appreciate the warmth of a home and the comforts of companionship.



It puzzles me therefore, why anyone would frown upon someone’s desire to share life’s path in matrimony or even “fine” people for being married. Two foes of marriage come to mind: people against same-sex marriage, and the Federal Government.

Clearly, all unions are not alike, just as people are not alike. Some scientists fault our hormone levels—the more or the less testosterone, the stronger or weaker the attraction toward the other gender. Nature is inscrutable. We can’t decipher her motives.  Yet, why make this a reason for keeping two individuals from entering into a warm and secure relationship? 



Perhaps I’m prejudiced in their favor. My daughter’s husband was transferred to New York and they had to leave their beautiful Victorian home behind. She had spent years restoring every detail to its original splendor and was broken-hearted. However, as luck would have it, two delightful gay people, who had fallen in love with each other, fell in love with the house and rented it. The house became the festive backdrop for their marriage, which had just been made possible. 



It will take for a society to adjust to a new way of thinking. However, as our last election confirmed, people are growing more tolerant. Six states do allow same-sex marriages now, while another five states sanction a civil union. Worldwide, we find eleven countries that have legalized it. Did you know that according to the U.S. census we have 115,064 same-sex households with children in this country? Having a loving home certainly improves a child’s chances for happiness than growing up in a foster-home or an orphanage.

The second foe of marriage is the Federal Government. It quietly “fines” every married couple with a “couples” tax! A married couple pays considerably more income tax on their combined taxable income than these two individuals would if they were not married!  But why?

I hear it will be worse next year. Obama’s Affordable Care Act levies a .9% surtax on any income above $200,000 for an individual, but the exclusion for a married couple is not $400,000 as we’d expect. It is only $250,000!

The IRS justifies it with its Head of Household Rule—a married couple needs only one bed, one stove and one roof. It ignores the possibility that one bed for two may lead to needing more beds in the future, that the kitchen and roof may need to be expanded and that expenses are bound to multiply.

Did our government forget its pledge to protect and promote the Pursuit of Happiness of its citizens? Levying a marriage fine certainly looks like it.  Be this as it may, always remember that a successful marriage requires falling in love many times, and always with the same person.

Until next time,
Rosi

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