Thursday, March 14, 2013

Cruising to Australia




On a chilly Sunday in early February in San Francisco I embarked on the Queen Victoria. The elegant Queen of the Cunard Line was bound for Australia. I had planned to get much writing done, but no such luck. There wasn’t time for it.

Every evening on the neatly folded-back bed next to the nightly chocolate lay the next day’s schedule of events—85-95 activities to choose from, every single day. They ranged from every kind of concert to Paddle Tennis and Golf Putting tournaments, Social Whist, Duplicate Bridge, Yoga, Trivia and Dancing, even Needle Work and Knitting were available. Daily lectures, shows and films rounded out the day.

In the spacious gym furnished with the latest equipment, passengers could enjoy a grand view of the sea while treading the mill or lifting weights. It provided a good balance to the joyful indulgence in superb meals and buffets, available twenty hours a day.

We learned about the impact of the weather that often has changed the course of history—the Russian winter that defeated Napoleon as well as Hitler’s mighty Wehrmacht; the heavy rains during World War I that turned the battlefield into a swamp and sucked in men, horses and equipment alike; the brief lull in the fierce stormy weather that made the Normandy Landing possible.

Col Steven Brown, Social Aid to the last five presidents, told us colorful stories about the social life at the White House. Why do men in a reception line at the White House always precede their wives? Simple. If women went first, they’d stop to chat, and it might take forever. Men, on the other hand, keep moving and their wives tend to follow them.

Mamie Eisenhower had a great gift for engaging her visitors in delightful conversation, but how did she end them? She’d change her handbag from one hand to the other, and an aid would suddenly appear telling her that she was needed elsewhere.

At afternoon teas, white-gloved waiters offered tiny cucumber and tomato sandwiches and delicate cakes. But beware when crossing the Equator; if you’re a pollywog never having it crossed before, you might be covered with food and thrown into the pool.

The lovely three-tiered Theatre offered comfortable boxes that could be reserved to drink fine champagne in privacy. Its 800 seats were often filled to capacity, watching Westside Story, the Comedian Adrian Walsh or the next port presentations. A two-story library offered a wide variety of books. Among my favorite spots were the Ping Pong corner and the Card Room where Bridge was taught, discussed and played under the guidance of two superb instructors, William and Dave.

The weather was perfect and the ship steamed along as steady as could be under the most capable of captains, a Woman. Not only a most capable woman, but also good-looking, charming, and active. She ran the ship, gave the Sunday sermon, made regular announcements, posed endlessly with passengers and signed certain items acquired on the ship. In an insightful talk about her life and running a ship, she also answered questions from the passengers with the greatest aplomb. No ship is running aground under her guidance.

May you too enjoy a cruise one day,
Rosi

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