Pigeons

I like birds and secretly wish I could fly too.

But today, my affection for birds was severely shaken. Pigeons had designated my smaller and rarely used balcony as their outhouse. When I went to water my plants on it, there wasn’t a spot where I could safely put my foot—it was covered with you-know-what. 

The floor, the walls, the glass, even my coveted plants were soiled. With a large needle I cleaned the netting of the screen door. Come to think of it, how in the world do they soil a vertical surface?

After two hours of scrubbing and cleaning I was determined that this was not going to happen again. I googled “how to keep pigeons from nesting on your deck” and adapted some of its suggestions. Instead of buying owls, I found five plastic water bottles in my recycling bin. I painted big black eyes on them. 

Then I strung a line across my deck and hung the bottles from it—some higher, some lower. They are gently moving in the breeze now looking downright threatening. For added effect I took off my black plastic gloves and tied them to the line too, hoping that the pigeons will take them for hungry black ravens. Then I sprinkled hot cayenne pepper on the banister and floor.

I straightened my back and looked at my work with satisfaction, wondering what the condo board will have to say. 

In the meantime, one thing is for certain — pigeons won’t visit me anymore.  

Until next time,

Rosi